Practices for Slowing Down: Possibilities of Spaciousness

There is plenty of space for you to feel what you feel and be as you are.

Hello, and welcome back to the final letter in this series about slowing down.

Give yourself time to slow down, beginning with Part 1, Part 2, and Part 3 if you haven’t had a chance yet.

Today, I invite you to welcome spaciousness by continuing to slow down, sense, and savor what is. This is the source of satisfaction and nourishment we need to deal with what is challenging in our strange, unfathomable human lives.

Practice

To create, rest in, and receive the gifts of spaciousness, the practice is to simply

s l o w d o w n.

We can create opportunities to slow down by prompting ourselves to pause periodically during daily activities or by scheduling time in places that enhance our capacity to be present.

These are some daily occurrences that prompt me to slow down:

1. When I notice tension in my mind or body

2. When I’m brushing my teeth

3. When I’m making tea

4. When I’m driving and have to stop at a red light

5. When I hear a bird

Places that help me slow down:

1. Anywhere with a tree nearby or a view of the open sky

2. Walking trails

3. A spot dedicated to reading/journaling

4. Time connecting with friends and family

5. Being in transition from one place to the next (I’m still very much working on slowing down during this in-between time. It seems more and more like life is always an experience of being in-between).

Your practice can include personalized prompts for daily activities (e.g., when you’re washing your hands) and specific places (e.g., your garden or kitchen) that are meaningful to you. Make it your own.

Once you’ve been nudged by the circumstances of what you’re doing or your environment, then you can choose how you’d like to pause for 10, 30, or 60 seconds, or perhaps 3, 5, or 10 minutes or more. It’s up to you.

Simple ways to pause:

1. Breathe slowly & deeply, or notice your breathing as it is

2. Put your hand on your heart or someplace that feels supportive (e.g., press one thumb into your other palm, or rest your hands on your forehead, jaw, or neck, give yourself a hug, or hold a pillow (my lovely students introduced me to squishmallows, and it’s been a game-changer).

3. Notice the space you’re in using the senses you have available. Perhaps you notice 5 things you might be able to see in this moment (look for the colors of the rainbow or things that make you smile), 4 things you might feel or touch (feel different textures or notice sensations of movement), 3 things you might be able to hear (listen for wildlife, rhythms, the space between sounds), 2 things you might smell (deepen your breath to notice fragrance), and 1 thing you might taste.

4. Savor something beautiful. Appreciate the light coming through the window, a piece of art, or a view of a tree or plant nearby. Maybe you notice an object that reminds you of what inspires you and what you value.

5. What sensation is there to enjoy? Perhaps it’s a deep breath, or a stretch, or a drink of water. Maybe it’s putting on a song and singing along or dancing or shaking it out.

Once again, these micro-moments of pausing and slowing down do not erase the struggles of our lives. This is not a quick-fix list (and there’s really no such thing).

If you don’t feel more spacious, grounded, and easeful after slowing down and pausing, there is not something wrong with you.

Feeling uncomfortable might be a sign that you are becoming more present and more in touch with the wholeness of being human. Feeling uncomfortable might also be a sign that a different type of support is necessary.

The practice is not to run away from what it feels like to be human, but to be more available for the fullness of each miraculous, mysterious, magical, and sometimes maddening moment.

Wise teachers have emphasized the importance of this practice centuries ago and now in our current times.

As Lao Tzu writes, “Nature does not hurry, yet everything is accomplished.”

Bayo Akomolafe insists, “The time is very urgent — we must slow down.”

Tricia Hersey invites and reminds us, “There is power in our rest and in our ability to slow down for the sake of collective healing and mourning. It’s time to rest.”

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Look for the messages of your life inviting you to slow down. Sometimes, speed bumps show up at inconvenient times. Sometimes, an unwanted experience like pain awakens us out of our hurried haze. Sometimes, too, it can be the grace of shadows shimmering on the wall in the afternoon sun that shifts us into awareness.

Perhaps it will be quite literal, as in my case. There’s a speedometer in my neighborhood that reads SLOW DOWN in big red letters if I’m going over 30 mph. When I drive under 30 mph, it says THANK YOU in green. I’m happy to receive either message. :)

Thank you for slowing down enough to read this, engage, reflect, and practice.

We all benefit from the quality of presence that is possible when we slow down.

Thank you for being.

With love & gratefulness always,

💜 Marissa

P.S. Please let me know how you liked receiving 4 shorter(ish) posts in the last few weeks. I might try to do this every now and then. I’m still figuring out what pace is sustainable. I’m so humbled and grateful for you being here with me in The Poppy Garden. 🧡